Over time, a relationship can start to feel like more of a chore than a pleasure. Learn some simple but effective ways to put the fun back into any long-term relationship that is starting to feel a little stale.
Why do relationships become boring?
When a couple is in the first flush of romance they just can’t get enough of each other, but over a period of weeks, months or even years the magic can start to fade. This happens for any number of reasons such as:
- Busy jobs leaving you exhausted
- Stress at work that follows you home
- Money worries
- Children, especially with the demands of young children
- Taking each other for granted
The good news is that a relationship experiencing a slow decline doesn’t necessarily have to hit rock bottom. There are a number of steps you can take, from setting aside regular times for a ‘date night’ to introducing a few adult toys into the bedroom. With just a little thought and planning you can recreate the magic of those heady early days when you couldn’t keep your hands off each other.
Making time for each other
It’s quite astonishing and alarming to observe just how quickly your initial closeness can start to fade as the day-to-day mundane aspects of real life soak up more and more of your time together, so stop the rot before it gets any worse. Schedule date nights book a babysitter if you have to but make sure you get out of the house for some quality time together.
Go to the cinema, or out for a meal or just out for a quiet drink. Even a walk in the countryside or a park can be rejuvenating. Spend time enjoying each other’s company and get that connection going again. Make an effort to put aside stresses and strains from work, family and friends and really concentrate having a good time.
A romantic weekend away can often put too much pressure on a couple which can create stress. This defeats the object so instead try spending money on a quiet weekend at home. Splash out on some decent wine and good quality food choose aphrodisiac foods such as oysters, asparagus and strawberries, all known to add a little extra libido just when it’s needed.
Try to connect with each other in the way you used to when you first got together. Put aside your differences and make a pact not to discuss finances, work, children or any other ‘trigger’ subjects on which you often disagree or even argue. This is time to enjoy each other’s company and cement the bond between you. Discussing the early days of your romance can be helpful to invoke the feelings from that time in your lives.
Never forget that underneath all of the daily stresses and strains you are both the same people who first met and fell in love with each other. Take time to celebrate your years together and reignite the passion.
Peter Smith has been writing about relationship issues for a variety of magazines and websites for over 15 years. Married with three children, Peter recommends browsing the merchandise at a reputable adult shop such as Sex Shop 365 to get you in the mood for love.